For today's post I would like to start at the basics with what I believe to be the basic three kinds of people looking for relationships.
No matter who you are, we as humans have difficulties knowing what we fully want in our relationships. There are a number of factors that help tie into why this is.
For one our ability to trust each other can very from person to person. Trust though is a very wide subject that I would like to wait to get into for a post of it's own.
Another is we do not know our selves well enough to know what we are missing in our lives and what we need out of our relationships (another article that will be its own post).
So getting right into the meat and potatoes of this theory, what are the three basic kinds of people?
1) The One Night Stand:
These are the kind of guys and girls that are least looking for a relationship. They cannot trust others emotionally and will tend to not be willing to form fully emotional bonds even with their friends. This is not always true though. sometimes they will fulfill their emotional needs with their friends and leave their lingering physical needs to emotionless "hook-ups." This is the kind of stereo-type that may fit for the single the frat brother. Their unwillingness to emotionally connect with their potential partner can stem from previous pain or just their fear of being hurt. Another possible mentality can be on of introversion (meaning looking in on themselves). They could just not have the "time" or the will to invest in someone else.
2) The Unsure:
These are people who make up the largest portion of the dating world. These are people who want a relationship but are not sure just how much they want to invest into said relationship. They could be afraid of being hurt or possibly still do not know what they need out of their partner. Everyone is different in this world and everyone has their own set of need. The key is finding out what those needs are. People who fit this category are people who could be viewed as "healthy." They are on the road to becoming more attuned to what they want and need to achieve happiness. They still have a ways to grow, but that is one of the wonders of being human. The fact that we can grow and learn what it will take to become happy is something wonderful. If you feel confused about what it is what you want, don't get stressed. Life is a marathon not a sprint and during that marathon we can only learn more about our selves to be able to run faster and better, so long as we do not give up.
3) The All-In:
This is the category for all of those people who have thought long on what they need out of a relationship. these are the people who are always searching for that one person who can fulfill their needs as well as do the same for their partner. these are the people who only see their partner. They love every second when they are with them and look forward to that next moment with them. these are the people who are able to put all of their emotional and physical trust into their partner. They are rare in my opinion. Sometimes people who are part of the "Unsure" category can think that they fit this category but an not quite their yet. They can lack the ability to trust in their partner even after a substantial amount of time. To most other parties, the "All-In" category can look a little overwhelming, but that is because someone who is in this category is as close to being in a married mindset as possible. When two "All-In" people find each other... woooh watch out.
Now I would like to remind that these are just the most basic of groupings. Their are a ton of variations of these three but for now I am only going to mention these.
Please comment with your takes on this theory and with questions. Also please explain your comments. This is how we start a logical conversation and can help ourselves become happier people.
I sign off of this post with these parting words:
"No matter what kind of person you are or what kind you are looking for there is someone out their for you. Never stop truely looking and never give up. Life can always get better."
-BooMan271
